How Being Your Authentic Self Will Help You Succeed

Authentic Self

What if I told you that the easiest way to get to the next level of success is to be more of you? It would be hard to believe because you probably already feel like you are like you as you can be right? Well, we are going to blow that notion up because you are not you, you are the tamed mild version of you. The gentle beast in you has been sleeping for a long while now, and it is time to wake it up. When Kobe Bryant becomes “The Black Mamba” its because he has awakened his inner beast. In those moments he is his most authentic self. It is time for you to find your most authentic self.


The True You is Your Authentic Self

From the moment we are born, our parents and others in the world shape our behaviors. The desire is getting you to act right.

  • Don’t say this
  • Don’t say that
  • Say hi
  • Be Polite
  • Have Manners
  • Be fair
  • Share what you have
  • Be caring
  • Do this
  • You should be this or that

We get these things ingrained in our brains. I am not saying they are a problem, but as Tim Grover talks about in his book Relentless, you must find your “Dark Side.” The dark side is where are real deep motivation comes from. It is who we are and not the perception we put out about who we are. Your dark side is much closer to your authentic self then you are willing to admit.

The perfect example of this is the words that come out of your mouth. You filter what you say to be polite. Your “dark side” is like a little kid that does not know how to filter what they say yet. Whatever comes to mind they just say it, they don’t care.

The problem is that you care too much about what other people think when the main thing you need to focus on is the result you want out of life. Instead, you’re distracted by what other people think of you. How are you supposed to go and play like a savage if you are always focused on being polite and being liked? You have to let go of the need of both, and the greatness you attain will make people like you anyway.

Being Honest About Your Dark Side

The Dark Side is what drives you, and it usually stems from things like sex, greed, desire, ego, lust you feel for things you’re not supposed to have. Some will argue and say this is untrue and it just shows that they have not come to grips with who they are. You cannot afford to do this same thing.

Admitting to what you want and what drives you is the first step to knowing who you are. We want to know the lovely side of ourselves, but we try hard to leave the negative stuff behind. That negative stuff is the fuel for the fire it is what give you your edge. To be able to get in the zone, lock-in and stay there you need to tap into that darkness.

Losing Your Dark Side

When I was in college, I had developed a mean streak in me and in stemmed from always feeling like the underdog and feeling inadequate because no one believed in me. Other people doubting me puts me in a dark place, it brings about a controlled rage that burns slowly over an extended period. At Iowa State, I remembered all of the schools I wanted to go to that didn’t recruit me. When I faced them, I wanted them to pay.

After I made the Olympic team and I graduated, I lost that edge for some reason. I started meditating more and being too happy and positive, and it did not work for me at all. What I needed was to be grimy! I needed to feel like no girls wanted me either because that would drive me to be great even more. That activated a sexual hole that needed to be filled, and it drove me, but once I graduated, I was engaged and getting ready for my wedding. I let go of all of that and my edge went with it. I no longer was performing at a high level.

Tiger Woods is the other classic example of losing the edge. He had a dark sexual side. He was a beast before the whole scandal but once that whole thing came out his entire life fell apart. Once the dark side came to light, it could not thrive there and neither could his career. There are a lot of athletes that have similar dark sides, but everyone has one.

Be Unapologetic for Who You Are

The world is in denial when it comes to the true self. Whether it be morals, religion or just guilt, it is usually easier to act like you are not something then it is to accept that it is a part of you that you will learn to control. The biggest thing you should not feel you need to do is to apologize.

That does not mean that people will not expect you to. They will because they want you to be nice. We were told to be polite, and part of doing these things me is always apologizing. We are at a point where we over apologize now. If anything happens, we say sorry five times to anyone near just in case. You know what I am talking about, that feeling of submitting to anyone around you for no reason. That is not a savage mentality. You can be a good athlete acting like these, but you will not become legendary.

Be The Best You

Accept that you are not you. You need to go on a lifelong search for your authentic self.  Take the mask off. Find your dark side. Attack your goals. Be unapologetic. It’s easier said than done, but so is being great! Many will get the wisdom, but few will profit from it. After reading this today, you have to decide if you will benefit from it or if you will merely here this and let it roll off your back. That is the only way to be. You set the tone for your life and your performances not the opinions of the sheep. Period!


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